The title of this blog post is actually a direct quote from lesson 52 of "A Course in Miracles," and it's something I touch upon in the "Everyday Subtle Energetic Influences" book.
In the book, I share a story of an experience I had when I was in my early or mid 20's that really brought that quote into full awareness for me.
In that experience, I was having a heated argument with my mom. Although I recall being very angry with her at the time, I don't recall what the argument was about. But, I acted very teen like and abruptly walked off fuming, as I made my way to my bedroom.
As I was walking down a split staircase that lead to my bedroom, I internally asked myself, "Why am I so angry?" The answer to that question came quickly, as I realized that I was angry with my mom because she was not acting or saying what "I" wanted her to act or say. Immediately following this, I thought, "Well, who am I to tell someone else what they should or should not be or do? I wouldn't want someone else doing that to me." This realization blossomed into an immediate sense of forgiveness towards my mom and especially myself, as I realized that "I" created the anger because she did not fulfill MY expectations. I did it to myself. And boy was I angry at the moment of our argument.
All this occurred while I was still walking down the stairs to go to my bedroom. By the time I reached my bedroom, I had forgiven her, and myself for creating the anger, and was left with a deep feeling of love for her and myself.
Lesson 52 in a Course in Miracles tries to help us to recognize that we often create our own versions of reality that are based on our expectations. So, in essence we really are "upset because we see what is not there." After all, it's not there. We put it there, as my story demonstrates.
Ironically, this was one of the reasons I created the "Appreciating Me Journal." It was an exercise that I had done myself initially, without any prompt, in 2005. Because, on the flip side of that is when others to that to us. When we don't fulfill their expectations. Often, this can be very much felt, if not verbally heard. But, this is just one aspect of how often the world around us tries to tell us who we are, what we are, and whether we are worthy. And given the often hostile comments and opinions of others on the internet today, the journal can truly help you to be more fully centered in recognizing your self-worth, that is not subject to what others have said/written or are creating.
I sincerely hope you'll consider what I wrote about in your own life. How often have you done this? How often have you felt or held anger because, in reality, they did not meet your expectations?
I hope you'll purchase a copy of the "Everyday Subtle Energetic Influences" book, and enter to win the "Appreciating Me Journal" and the "My Appreciating me Notebook," so you can do all the exercises to help yourself feel more calm, quiet, and centered in your self-worth.